To the editor: I very much enjoyed reading guest contributor Amy Getubig’s piece (“Women aren’t too picky to date. They just don’t need men to feel fulfilled,” April 9). I certainly do not question her experiences, but two things did pop out to me.
First, she brings up a cliché: “Los Angeles is a city built on reinvention. People come here to create something.” This isn’t really the experience for the broad swath of people who were born in L.A. and whose social circles also comprise people who were born here.
And yes, people from other parts of the country do come here to reinvent. But as someone who grew up here, my friends who felt a strong need to reinvent also moved away to places like San Francisco, Seattle, New York City and Portland, Ore. I’m sure Getubig’s statement is true for a large number of transplants, but it doesn’t really explain Los Angeles to anyone who isn’t part of that transplant group.
I found her other insights compelling and intriguing. However, there seems to be a generalization made. There are both men and women who might want relationships, but whose life experience is very different because of age. Men and women in their mid-20s and men and women in their late 30s and early 40s are living very different lives and are in very different places in becoming who they are. It’s not a one-size-fits-all thing.
I would think that more nuanced explanations would be welcome after reading this very good first step at explaining the present situation.
Jerome Vered, Los Angeles